Malawi Inde: The Warm Heart of Africa: May 2013

“Sons [and daughters] are a heritage from the Lord, children a reward from Him.”

~Psalm 127:3~

I’m not perfect. I must admit that I don’t always know what I’m doing. I’m not always patient, nor do I display the best poise when relating to others…especially at work. Sometimes I just can’t wait for the day to be over (it has more to do with the people I’m working with…sadly)! However, despite everything I know I’m called to be here in Malawi and I do my best to enjoy the unique/priceless experience. When I’m there with the kids on the pediatric ward, I make it my duty to do my best; to give that child my all.

One good thing about working in a small hospital is that often times you bump into the same patients and their guardians when they return for checkups (Sometimes I’ll see them in town… Blantyre is a small city). I could blame in on my “Americaness” as to why they are so happy to see me or why they thank me over and over again for the care I gave their child; as if I was the sole person who helped restore their child to health. They comment on how I was “so nice” or that I was “always there”. Yet I can’t take the credit. I always say that it was a team effort; the doctor(s) and nurses all played a role. It’s God’s love shining through. It’s in moments like these that I forget the fatigue and the various frustrations, and I say to myself, “It’s all worth it! I love what I do. I love being a nurse.”

The other day I was able to spend some quality time with Idah, one of the young mothers on the unit. Her daughter, Angel, was born at 28 weeks and it was their last night in the hospital before going home after a 6 week stay. I was busy the entire day with my 4 patient load (I’m horrible, I know it! Can barely handle 3! Novice indeed!!!) and promised Idah that I’d spend time with her and the baby doing Kangaroo Care . However, the only free I had was after work. So when the shift ended, I quickly ran home, washed up, and changed into some “germ free” clothes and headed back to the hospital.

It was nice. Since I wasn’t in uniform/on duty, I wasn’t pressed for time and my attention wasn’t divided on other patients. The moment was intimate. As Idah held the naked Angel to her bare chest, she talked and I listened. She talked about her first impression of me. How she thought I was stern and mean, but how it quickly changed when I quickly seemed to be “always” there in those critical moments(I guess I tend to have my game-face on when I’m working…I need to lighten up! J)… And many of the times Angel wasn’t even one of my patients! I listened to how, not only grateful she was for the care, but for the miracle and grace God has shown her family. Angel is her first child and, as a brand new mother and newlywed barely celebrating her 1 year anniversary, having a baby born 12 weeks early was a lot to take in!

Idah’s from the northern part of Malawi and was on holiday when she came down to the south to see her husband, Ndiza. Ndiza left only a few days later for a project in Mozambique, when the bleeding and lower abdominal pains started. Alone, save for one older sister, she had to borrow a neighbor’s car to drive herself to the hospital. Within 24 hours after admission, the tiny 900+ gram baby Angel was born.

Idah described how scared she was; how she cried herself to sleep every night. How she didn't think she was strong enough and thought her baby would die (Malawi's infant mortality rate is #9 in the world!). She told herself Angel was just way too small! However, Angel is a fighter! As each week passed, she became stronger and stronger. She no longer needed intravascular fluids. She no longer needed her nasogastric tube and could now be fed with the bottle; then the breast. She was able to sleep in a bassinet, instead of the incubator (I still remember when they Idah and her husband got to hold Angel for the first time! It was so emotional!). Her little lungs started to mature, to where she was weaned off oxygen completely (that actually happened when I was caring for her!)! She even has a preferred side she liked to sleep on! Now she’s smiling in her sleep. God is sooo AWESOME!!! The best part about this is that Idah and Ndiza are able to see and experience God’s goodness and mercy! We are all humbled, especially when we consider the number of term babies , over the last 6 weeks, who didn't make it (little Aryan was one of them)!

In those 20 minutes of uninterrupted time, Idah and I learned a lot about each other. It’s in those rare moments that I thank God for calling me to this special work. He has allowed me to see glimpses of how sweet heaven will be. He uses me despite all my many short comings. He’s merciful, gracious, long-suffering, faithful and just plain old amazing! I’m humbled.

I still continue to pray for the precious little ones that come through my care. Many times, because I’m human, I forget their names, but their faces I cannot.